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Traducerea - Turcă-Engleză - "yalnızlık. her kimliÄŸe doÄŸuÅŸtan yazılı tek...

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Titlu
"yalnızlık. her kimliğe doğuştan yazılı tek...
Text
Înscris de eymen
Limba sursă: Turcă

Sade ölüm değil, ayrılık da yaşamın emri. Evet söyledi ya da ben duydum. Duyduğuma göre elbet bir ses söyledi bu söylendikçe usulen söylenir olan sözleri. Evet duydum,söyledi. Her duyduğumda ağladım. Pek çok ağlayışım sırasında duydum. Kalbim tutanak tuttu duyduklarıma. "Soruldu" dedi, cevap alındı. "Yaşamak" dedi, "Tek marifetiniz, biraz özen gösteriniz." "Zulüm kimse zalimlik yapmayınca biter, mazlumlar dahil." dedi. "Ama yapmayın, o daha bir ÇOCUK" dedi Tanrı.
Observaţii despre traducere
bu metin daha önce sundugum bir metnin devamidir ceviriyi yapacak arkadaslarin metnin ilk yarisini okumasinda yarar var tesekkurler

http://www.cucumis.org/tercume_12_t/ceviriyi-incele_v_243752.html

Titlu
Not only death, but also separation is the order of life.
Traducerea
Engleză

Tradus de Çevirmen
Limba ţintă: Engleză

Not only death, but also separation is the order of life. Yes, he said, or I heard. If I heard, certainly a voice said words that are said for the sake of formality when they are said. Yes, I heard he said. I cried each time I heard the voice. I heard it many times when I cried. My heart noted what I heard. He said "it has been asked", a reply is received. He said "living, that's your sole talent, take care of it"; he said "cruelty will end when nobody persecutes anyone, including those who have been wronged". God said "but do not do that, he is still a CHILD"
Observaţii despre traducere
it is a philosophic text. In text, "he" refers to God. And, those who have been wronged means here people who were persecuted.

- for the sake of formality: alternatively, words [b]that become some kind of formality[/b]
Validat sau editat ultima dată de către Lein - 27 Ianuarie 2011 16:58





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20 Ianuarie 2011 22:44

merdogan
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3769
I cried each time I heard the voice...> I cried always when I heard it.

21 Ianuarie 2011 11:15

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389
Again, this doesn't change the meaning at all! But the wording is better the way Çevirmen put it so I'll leave it. We don't need the literal translation per word, we need a translation that captures the correct meaning of the original.

21 Ianuarie 2011 21:41

merdogan
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3769
Can be but "the voice" is not in original.
AGAIN, as I know we can't add new words.

I am a native reader and you don't bleive me.
Can I ask why ?
and Why do you have a prejudice against me?

24 Ianuarie 2011 11:25

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389
I believe you know what the original says; where I don't agree with you is that every word in the original must have a corresponding word in the translation. We can't add new words when that changes the meaning of the text. That is not the case here.

The reason why I start getting a bit exasperated with your comments sometimes is that you keep 'correcting' translations by changing words without changing the meaning of the text. Often, there are more ways than one to say something while keeping the same meaning.
An example:

My friend was here. My friend said something. I heard what he said.

My friend was here. He said something. I heard what he said.

My friend was here. He said something. I heard him.

My friend was here. He said something. I heard it.

All these sentences have the same meaning. If the top one is the most literal translation, please don't try to 'correct' the fourth one if someone has used it, because the meaning is the same!
I hope you see what I am trying to say...

25 Ianuarie 2011 12:59

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389
Not a lot of votes... Could you look at this when you have some time please, Bilge? Thank you

CC: Bilge Ertan

25 Ianuarie 2011 17:19

Bilge Ertan
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 921
Hi Lein,

I think it is not so easy but I'll try to do my best. The third sentence should be something like this:

-If I heard, certainly a voice said words that become some kind of formality as/when they are said (many times)

And the others:

- When I cried the hardest, I heard it. => I heard it many times while crying. ( or when I cry)

-He said "you asked" => He said "It has been asked "

-cruelty would end if nobody persecuted anyone, including those who have been wronged => Cruelty will end/ends when nobody persecute anyone (anymore)

- God said "but do not do that, it is still a CHILD => I think here we should use he instead of it. So: He's still a child.


Ask me if you have some questions.

25 Ianuarie 2011 18:22

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389
Thank you!

Hi Çevirmen

Do you agree with Bilge's comments? If you are happy with them I'll edit and accept. If you don't agree, please let me know
Thanks!

27 Ianuarie 2011 12:27

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389
No reply from Çevirmen

I have edited except the line about cruelty. Do you mean the second part ('including those who have been wronged') should be deleted?
Thanks again

CC: Bilge Ertan

27 Ianuarie 2011 16:46

Bilge Ertan
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 921
Hi Lein,

No, it shouldn't be deleted, I just forgot to write this part of the sentence after correcting the first part. Your corrections are good. I think the translation is OK now.

You are welcome

27 Ianuarie 2011 16:59

Lein
Numărul mesajelor scrise: 3389