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Vertimas - Vokiečių-Anglų - Kleid aus Rosen

Esamas statusasVertimas
Šis tekstas išverstas į šias kalbas: VokiečiųAnglų

Kategorija Daina - Meilė / Draugystė

Tai "bendrosios prasmės" vertimo prašymas.
Pavadinimas
Kleid aus Rosen
Tekstas
Pateikta Freya
Originalo kalba: Vokiečių

Ein gutes Mädchen lief einst fort
Verließ der Kindheit schönen Ort
Verließ die Eltern und sogar
den Mann, dem sie versprochen war

Vor einem Haus, da blieb sie stehn
Darinnen war ein Mann zu sehn
Der wilde stach in nackte Haut
Da rief das gute Mädchen laut:

Meister, Meister gib mir Rosen
Rosen auf mein weißes Kleid
Stech die Blumen in den bloßen
unberührten Mädchenleib

"Diese Rosen kosten Blut"
Sprach der Meister sanft und gut
"Enden früh dein junges Leben,
will dir lieber keine geben"

Doch das Mädchen war vernarrt
Hat auf Knien ausgeharrt
Bis er nicht mehr widerstand
Und die Nadel nahm zur Hand

Und aus seinem tiefen Stechen
Wuchsen Blätter, wuchsen Blüten
Wuchsen unbekannte Schmerzen
In dem jungen Mädchenherzen

Später hat man sie gesehn
Einsam an den Wassern stehn
Niemals hat man je erfahrn
Welchen Preis der Meister nahm...
Pastabos apie vertimą
Subway to Sally - Kleid aus Rosen

Thank you! :)

Pavadinimas
Dress of Roses
Vertimas
Anglų

Išvertė patty bouvier
Kalba, į kurią verčiama: Anglų

A good girl ran away earlier
Left childhood's beautiful place
Left the parents and even
The man she was promised to

In front of a house she stopped
Inside a man could be seen
who pierced pictures into naked skin
Then the good girl shouted out

Master, master give me roses
Roses on my white dress
Stick the flowers into the naked
Untouched body of this girl

"These roses cost blood"
Spoke master soft and good
"They cut your young life short,
I'd rather not give you any"

But the girl was madly in love
On her knees persisted
Until he didn't resist anymore
And he took the needle in his hand

And from his deep incision
Grew leaves, grew bloods
Grew unknown pains
In the heart of the young girl

Later somebody saw her
Standing alone at the water's edge
Nobody ever discovered
What price the Master took...
Pastabos apie vertimą
Roses on my white dress: probably meaning on my white skin
Validated by Lein - 17 sausis 2011 12:44





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Pranešimas

13 sausis 2011 14:01

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
Hi patty bouvier

Just a few remarks here to improve the English text, please let me know what you think of them:

A good girl ran away earlier
Left childhood's beautiful place
Left the parents and even
The man she was promised to

In front of a house she stopped
Inside a man could be seen
Wild one stuck into bare skin -> This was a mistake in the request I think - it should be: der Bilder stach in nackte Haut -> who pierced pictures into naked / bare skin
Then the good girl shouted loudly, or (I think this fits better) shouted out

Master, master give me roses
Roses on my white dress
Stick the flowers into the naked
Untouched body of this girl

"These roses cost blood"
Spoke master soft and good
"They cut your young life short,
I'd rather not give you any"


But the girl was in love
On her knees persisted
Till he didn't resist anymore
And he took the needle in his hand

And from his deep incision
Grew leaves, grew bloods
Grew unknown pains
In the heart of the young girl

Later somebody saw her
Standing alone at the water's edge
Nobody ever discovered
What price the Mmaster took...

13 sausis 2011 14:00

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
Hi nevena

Have a look at my post above and if you agree, could you correct the second verse? ('der wilde stach' -> 'der Bilder stach' )
Thank you!

CC: nevena-77

13 sausis 2011 14:31

Freya
Žinučių kiekis: 1910
I'm sorry for the trouble. I took the lyrics from the internet. It seems that I didn't pick a good source.

Thank you all!

13 sausis 2011 14:40

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
No worries, only a small mistake

14 sausis 2011 10:59

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
No reply
I have edited. Next time, patty, please let us know what you think when there are people trying to help and improve your translations

Could one of the German experts please edit the line in the second verse?

der wilde stach -> der Bilder stach in nackte Haut

Thanks!

CC: nevena-77 iamfromaustria

14 sausis 2011 11:36

patty bouvier
Žinučių kiekis: 5
I'm so sorry that i replied so late.But i'm busy with my exams.And i'm glad that you've edited my mistakes.
Thanks.

14 sausis 2011 11:38

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
OK, no worries and good luck with your exams

(I saw you had logged in but not replied, that is why I went ahead and edited.)

14 sausis 2011 11:42

patty bouvier
Žinučių kiekis: 5
Thanks a lot.
Yes,but there isn't enough time for me to edit.I hope you'll understand.

14 sausis 2011 15:17

merdogan
Žinučių kiekis: 3769

Dear Lein,
I agree with you for,
"who pierced pictures into bare skin"
"shouted out"

and
But the girl was in love...> But the girl was in crazy love
Mmaster...> master (last line)

14 sausis 2011 15:47

Lein
Žinučių kiekis: 3389
Oops! Corrected the double M! I'll wait for patty's reply on the other point

14 sausis 2011 16:09

patty bouvier
Žinučių kiekis: 5
Yes,i agree with merdogan for, 'but the girl was in crazy love.'